So, one goat says to another: "Why are we in a Ram truck, anyway?"

Oh hey y'all!! Thanks for stopping by my fabulous imaginary party 60 years ago. Here I am in my divine hostess finery and pearls. Time for a cocktail, yes? (I am, apparently, the inspiration for Paris Hilton's bad posture in the future.)

My last post might have seemed like a non-sequitur- the Spartan trailer and the Apple mouse. As I've been foraging for flooring materials I have been musing about elegance, clean lines and the elusive concepts of Good Design and Good Living. What makes the everyday more beautiful, more functional? 

I will spare you a scholarly side trip down mid-century lane, but suffice to say if you have any interest at all in vintage silver- bullet style trailers, this design aesthetic resonates with you. You get it- on some level, it speaks to you. Could be your rarified taste, could be nostalgia, who cares why, but you LIKE it.  Fair? 

I like it, too. Specifically, I like the idea of indoor/ outdoor living, the warmth of natural materials and open spaces. I like architecture that "floats". 

I've been spending quite a bit of time admiring architecture lately. This guy Eichler, one of the visionaries driving modern design, for everyone (he designed for the middle class) well, he saw a different way of living, of taking up space. This is so different from old-style traditional American homes; it was so much less formal. 

Annnd... back at my imaginary cocktail par-tay... what all of this really speaks to in me is that I want to spend more time with family and friends. I was BORN to talk and eat. I want to look at the natural world and connect with it. As I look at these spaces, what I think is how wonderful they are for filling with people and good conversation. In the photo above, my eye goes to the patio and I yearn to be out there. It looks like twilight, which is the BEST time of day. Work done, relax mode ON, time briefly suspended. 

In the photo below I want to turn the vantage point, to look out the glass walls. I want to throw open the doors. This inspires me when I think of building the Spartan camp. I want to be outdoors-indoors. I want cozy and open. I want to fill it up with people; interesting people I know already, and friends yet to be made. I want YOU all to be there. 

What do you think? Are you coming?? PLEEEEEASE come! I'm saving you a spot;) 

The Apple.... 

... does not fall... 

... far from the tree! 

The legend is that Steve Jobs grew up in an Eichler- style California Mid-Century Modern home. 

Coincidence?  

What do you think about a central vacuum system? 'Cause if there is one thing I've learned from surfing the internet it is that there are things you never even thought of that you might want! 

Nutone's entry level central vacuum is great for small homes 2200 square feet. Well designed and powerful the Nutone CV400 fits the job, whether its your home, garage, RV, or boat.. This vacuum has a small footprint so it takes up less space. Drawing only 8.5 amps of power the CV400 is energy efficient. 

It's 11inches in circumference, 30 inches high. I wonder if it could be hidden in the old heater box? or by the wheels in the corner of the kitchen cabinets? 

Good idea to keep dust/ pet hair down OR waste of space/ time/ money? Have I gone ca-razy?? 

From the Killing Me Softly files: Death By Flooring Options. 

Yes. I am being "serious". 

I know that the Spartan will have to endure baking in the Texas sun. One of my priorities is not to have chemicals off gassing and making it smell bad, and BE bad for healthy breathing. 

The other logistical considerations: weight, wear, keeping clean and looking clean (2 different things!). 

And... of course: STYLE. 

This is my attempt to choose by ordering samples on-line from Marmoleum. Left sample= Too damn dark. Right sample= better, but not sure I like the "stone" effect... not very vintage, and kinda bland.  

Oh, and one other thing.

Bear in mind that I have 200 square feet to cover, + the recommended 10% overage=  220 sf.  So, this is just not going to be a minor line item on by budget. Ahem. 

I like linoleum. Old school, green, long wearing. Fashion colors, ya'll! Except- for once in my life, I don't want flashy. I want it to look good, but, be neutral enough that I can change things up without, say, a blood red floor. Which would be killer! But... might get on my nerves over time. 

And, at $5 plus/ sf we are talking about a $1,000 minimum. Which means I need to LOVE it. Sigh. Keep looking. 

This is my trip to the decorator floor showroom. They have a crayon box worth of choices, but I have to remember not to fly over to the brightest thing like a magpie. Left/Green- meh, Center/Yellow- too boring, Right/ Red- fussy) 

I also am guessing at how the it will complement my beechwood interior. All samples are photographed up against wood to check how they "work" with it. I am concerned about the trailer being dark- the chocolate brown floor in there now does a helluva job hiding dirt, but, it hardly brightens up the place. 
Here I am at the "Green" showroom, which has lovely things, wonderful vibes- and everything costs the moon and has to be special ordered. 

Left/ Yellow- NO. NO. NO!  Middle/Gray- Actually my favorite of the bunch, but worried it will be too dark. Right/ Blue- Pretty. Very pretty. But... not neutral.

There were also trips to dive-y little flooring closeout places, and big box stores, but they could not really communicate the whole VOC/ toxic status to me.  And, to be honest, at this point I was just exhausted and overwhelmed and sick of thinking about flooring. 

God, it's not even fun to write about the flooring headache. Why? Why are you still reading this?? 

What do you think? Are you an interior decorator person magically reading my blog and dying to advise me? ADVISE ME. Should I bite the bullet and go with the Gray? It's kinda masculine and crisp looking to me. The mottling is prettier in person. Or the Blue? Sky blue, more fun, relaxed, vacation-y. 

Ackkkkkkk!!!!! I. Don't. KNOW. Or really care anymore. Apathy for the win!!

It will come as no shock that I am much better at buying accessories than I am at buying, you know, actual raw materials that have to be transformed into something recognizable. And the more those accessories look like, well, frankly, jewelry, the better I am at it. 
While I was suppose to be making Very Important Decisions about Fantastic Fans, I got sidelined by this beautiful, classic little fan. 12Volts, hard wires in. It's So Sweet, I know! It's small- just 7 inches- and I think I will tuck it in the corner of the kitchen, someplace where it won't be in the way but can cool down the cook or get rid of food smells. Or just give you that supermodel-in-the-wind fan effect. 

Whoa! Sexy Hair at the Trailer Park!! (Apologies to any Beyonce fans; she's just the first over-fanned hair photo I found!) 

Ok, ok, OK. I know, back to Fantastic Fans, which are apparently, The Thing. I have mixed feelings about these guys. See, I'm not always great at being "practical". I read the reviews that these suckers WORK, the push the hot air out of your trailer- very important in Texas. They cool. They have translucent blades so you still get light. They, very accommodatingly, might I add, make silver covered lids so they look vintage. Except they don't. Look Vintage, that is. I (whispers) think it's kinda ugly.  

So, I have purchased 3 of these, and I am trying to be HAPPY and EXCITED. Which is kinda hard, tbh. But some people, it seems, have the real HOTS for these babies. (See what I did there? I'll see myself out...) 
This is evidenced by the below proof, which I swear is NOT a photoshop mock up. It is, in fact, a published book, which you can pay money for. 

It's, uhhh, well, I'll let it speak for itself: 

“This is a love story. Not just any love story; it is my love story. It may seem like an ordinary tale to most people. There is nothing earth-shattering about it, yet it shattered my earth.”

With alarming honesty, Milks details the lasting love affair that everyone said wouldn't last—the risks they both took and the payoff they finally realized when husband Steve's configuration for a better ventilation fan for recreational vehicles was, indeed, a winner.

Well. O-k then. 

So, what do YOU think? Will I, like so many other hapless recreational vehicle owners, be swept up the thorny rose and strong, manly arms of the Fan-tastic Fan?? And will it be Earth-Shattering???? Will it?!  

Check out this amazing Spartan trailer with a house built around it on a river in Texas. I have to say; generally, I am not prone to jealousy. Usually, I'm happy with what I have and not frustrated by what others have, even when I deeply admire it. 

So, I feel a little sheepish admitting that the green-eyed monster bit me when I saw this. OUCH! Want. Want. Wantwantwantwant. WANT. (Falls over, comatose) 

I had a real pity party- sulking that someone else is "living my dream!" (like I own it, ha!). And they QUITE obviously have the means to live it pretty luxe. I'm not fooled by "simple elegance"- I know high-end when I see it, damn it. Ugh. Those kind of petty feelings are SO miserable; it makes you so unhappy. Yuk. How do people endure it for long? 

But... I mean, can you blame me? Look again, DRINK it in, in all it's stunning photography: 

That is very, very breathtaking. No lie. The mirror image just slays me. 

Upon review, I realized that my feelings are closer to sadness and yearning. I have been trying to execute this concept for 5 years now. What I really want is MY beautiful trailer, sheltered with an elegant structure, in the Hill Country in Texas. 

And I will get there. It might not be on land quite as spectacular as this. It might not be as shiny. But. Inspiration is FREE, and there are lots of things going on here that are just so very well done. I started appreciating how cool these people are to choose this, when they clearly could have a much less unique place. 

I also realized that I don't want to obscure my trailer this much. I want it to be more visible, more focal. Which is to say: This is a Very, Very, Very Beautiful Baby. But it ain't my Baby. 

I hope someday I get to see this place in person and tell them how wonderful it is. 

And invite them to my place so I can share what my dream looks like when it's done. 

...from these vintage red glass beehive tail lights I bought on Etsy! I had one original glass one identical to these, and one plastic, more square-ish one on the other side that had been replaced later. Now I will have a set and a spare. Any vintage trailer person will tell you that having a spare part is true luxury. 

These have been sitting on my bookshelf like little sculptures. They make me smile while I walk by. Their day is coming! 

The seller has a small, well-curated shop of vintage trailer lovelies. Worth a peek. I love to think of all the mysterious people in the background of my trailer project... cool people out there doing cool things, and we intersect, briefly. Thanks for rescuing these for me, Etsy guy! 

One very comforting thing about John the Contractor is that he is Very Tidy. I know: that IS a strangely prim sentence. But, truly, given that the trailer recently looked like the remnants of a plane wreck deep in the jungle, I have learned to appreciate the beauty of order. 

It's still spooky- like looking at negative space- but not as horrifying. More mystifying. Where's my beautiful honey colored birch wood? Where's my cute stuff? Um, where is the floor?? What is the meaning of life? Will I ever find true happiness?? Whoa, dude, gotta sit down again. My head hurrrrts.

John IS Tidy. The black hole in my trailer universe is just an illusion. My trailer still exists- albeit in 10,000 neatly stacked pieces.